The hideous swamp creature, former FBI Director James Comey, slithered and slimed his way before the Senate Select Intelligence Committee on Thursday to give testimony that many of the vile vermin that inhabit this country hoped would deal a death wound to our Triumphant God Emperor Donald J. Trump. To the hideous creature’s dismay the alpha male Trump was cunning and smart. In an earlier duel Trump had plucked one of the beast’s fangs from his mouth and saved it for a later battle. Unwittingly, the Swamp Creature had crafted his own undoing. With the poisonous fang securely in our God Emperor’s hand he stood before the creature’s lair and boasted of his newfound treasure.
The waters of the swamp splashed and shuddered from the murky water’s inhabitants shaking in fear in unison!
“Trump has the poison fang of Quantico,” they cried!
Unbeknownst to the onlookers that were cheering and hissing in hopes that our valiant hero would be finished off and exiled from the reclaimed palace at the center of the swamp, the creature had already been fatally wounded!
The slow acting poison of the creature itself took root in a festering wound left by the Master of MAGA! As the hideous swamp creature lumbered out of it’s murky lair and onto the scene his eyes rolled back and this head fell. Following the swiftly dropping head it’s body soon crashed into the stinking mud along the bank of the foul swamp. The ground shook as if it had been pounded with thunder from Thor himself!
As the creature wailed and writhed in pain the Goblin Press claimed the beast had captured Trump beneath its scaly hide!
The vile vermin cheered! They all believed that in the creature’s demise it had vanquished our great hero Trump!
The dust soon settled but astonishingly a hand with leather gauntlet reached out from under the stricken beast!
It was he! Our hero, Trump!
Amazingly, not only was Trump alive but he was now lifting the carcass of the beast onto his shoulder!
“Trump! Trump! Trump!” The crowd cheered and cried with admiration and excitement!
Then with one masterful movement our Hero, our God Emperor Trump flung the dead creature into the putrid mucky waters.
Before the living legend was out of sight he turned to the crowd and said –
” BUILD THAT WALL!”